Thursday, December 1, 2011
Un-Spratt Church Rejects Fat and Skinny Spouses
By Winsip Custer CPW News Services
People use to accept Jack Spratt and his wife. No longer. Acting on the example of the Kentucky Freewill Baptist Church that rejected interracial marriage, the new Well-Yoked Fellowship of Venice Beach, California, formerly the Lord of the Palates Assembly, which meets in the Bronze Age Maxi-Gym has announced a new leniency toward divorce. “The Bible says that we should not be unequally yoked,” said the church’s pastor, Rev. Blaine B. Knox. “It goes without saying that Susan and Sidney Farmer, Jack and Betty Crow and Sammy and Beth Foreman are as unequally yoked as a Clydesdale and a Shetland Pony.”
Dr. Barry G. Griswell of the nearby Center for Centered Living said “it is a well established fact that we human beings share a common gnome that survived the mating of the first modern humanoids and Neanderthals to provide 98% duplication of the human DNA. However, in the case of Jack and Betty Crow that little bundle of 98% similarity of DNA is carried in package that is 95.5% heavier in Betty’s case. I can fully understand why Rev. Knox is taking the position he is taking, “ said Dr. Griswell as he spoke from his Nordic Track elliptical trainer.