Gay Marriage Good For Planet Earth
by Winsip Custer CPW News Service
California is only the second state in the U.S. that allowed same sex marriages and then discontinued the practice based on the passage of Proposition 8. From June 16, 2008 to November 5, 2008 it was allowed. With Proposition 8's passage the California Constitution limited marriages to a union between a man and a woman. Presumably this still allows for marriages between what may not appear to be men or women. Some have asked that sexual genetic identification for marriage be determined by the 1905 discovery which identified women as having the XX and men as having the XY chromosomes, but so far such testing is not required except in professional and Olympic sports competition. Proponents of heterosexual marriage argue that there is no greater competitive sport in the world than heterosexual marriage as evidenced by the statistics chronicling mental, emotional and physical abuse as well as divorce.
With emotions in California rising over Proposition 8 a variety of diverse groups are supporting same sex marriage citing its demonstrated positive impact on the environment. "There is virtually no better way to guarantee a lower human population than through abstinence, birth control methods like condoms and pills and other devices, abortions, gay marriage, war and plagues. Fewer people will improve everything. We believe that of all the methods, gay marriage is the most environmentally friendly method of population control especially if gay couples continue to practice the same level of attention to cleanliness for which they are currently known. Heterosexual marriages are especially messy in comparison and the little nippers that follow are especially problematic," said Farnsworth P. Willowwick of the citizens group Less than Zero.
Virginia Rodmann, spokesperson for LeFemmine de Butche', the largest pro-no-child-producing gay women's group in the San Francisco area said "when gay marriage amendments are accompanied with a ban against semen sharing, there is a 100% chance that population decline will continue to good effect, but this will inevitably create a large black market in underground semen sample production. Just as prohibition created an explosion in criminal enterprises, so would the banning of lesbian, homosexual and heterosexual semen and egg sharing," said Rodmann. "But even so, I can't imagine that gay and lesbian couples will ever produce the number of offspring that we currently see among heterosexuals, especially Roman Catholic ones," said Rodmann. Rodmann's group is exploring the possibility that a new Proposition 9 which repeals Proposition 8 if an iron-clad prohibition on egg and semen exchange will help to reinstate the short-lived gay and lesbian marriage arrangement. Fearing Proposition 9's passage, conservative evangelical California cryonics entrepreneur, Redman Duval Turgeson, has initiated record levels of egg and semen storage in his five California storage facilities. "Some have said that I've decided that if I can't lick 'em I'll join 'em, but I can assure you that I'm not lickin' anybody and I'm certainly not join' 'em. I'm not giving up, I'm just hedging my bets," said Turgeson who also said that the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, without God's people lifting a finger in contempt or retaliation, was a Biblical example of God cleaning house of planet polluters, though he can't understand why most Gays and Lesbians have a higher level of concern for keeping their "cages clean" and their domiciles neatly appointed and color coordinated.
Creating a new advertising consortium aimed at promoting the favorable zero-population aspects of same sex relationships and marriages and underwriting advertising and public relations campaigns with some of Madison Avenue's leading advertising firms are:
Gays For No PopGrow
EGay and ELesbian Harmony.Com
Les Is More
Gay Is Good For Planet Earth
ByeByeBabyByeBye LLP
Greater San Francisco SeeManNoSeMen Society
The GenderNoEngending Assocation of Anneheim
Conservative Evangelical Gays for Childrens' Playground Conversions
Gays and Lesbians Against Lactation
Gay Baby Sitters for State Sponsored Hospice Worker Training
Gay Scout Masters for Disposition of BSA Real Estate
Gays Against Toys-R-US
Gay Gunmen for Blank Shooting Gun Clubs of America
Lesbian Horticulturists for Sterile Human Hybridization
The Gay and Lesbian Anti-Chucky Cheese Alliance
The Bay Area Onan Assembly
Draper Donaldson of the Madison Avenue advertising and public relation's firm of Donaldson, Nicholson and Steele said "getting the world to rethink it's sexual orientation is perhaps the greatest public relations challenge since the discovery of tobacco's negative health effects, but we believe we are up to the job," said Donaldson who jokingly called the new emphasis "pubic relations". Donaldson and Steele, who spent a week in California gathering research for their work said that they enjoyed the fellowship of the Bay Area Onan Assembly the most, but felt some emotional trauma during their target practice with the Gay Gunmen for Blank Shooting Gun Clubs of America and the dinner they hosted in their honor. "The whole world depends on this campaign and producing effective ads that reach India, China and Africa is perhaps the greatest challenge of my life," Donaldson concluded.
by Winsip Custer CPW News Service
California is only the second state in the U.S. that allowed same sex marriages and then discontinued the practice based on the passage of Proposition 8. From June 16, 2008 to November 5, 2008 it was allowed. With Proposition 8's passage the California Constitution limited marriages to a union between a man and a woman. Presumably this still allows for marriages between what may not appear to be men or women. Some have asked that sexual genetic identification for marriage be determined by the 1905 discovery which identified women as having the XX and men as having the XY chromosomes, but so far such testing is not required except in professional and Olympic sports competition. Proponents of heterosexual marriage argue that there is no greater competitive sport in the world than heterosexual marriage as evidenced by the statistics chronicling mental, emotional and physical abuse as well as divorce.
With emotions in California rising over Proposition 8 a variety of diverse groups are supporting same sex marriage citing its demonstrated positive impact on the environment. "There is virtually no better way to guarantee a lower human population than through abstinence, birth control methods like condoms and pills and other devices, abortions, gay marriage, war and plagues. Fewer people will improve everything. We believe that of all the methods, gay marriage is the most environmentally friendly method of population control especially if gay couples continue to practice the same level of attention to cleanliness for which they are currently known. Heterosexual marriages are especially messy in comparison and the little nippers that follow are especially problematic," said Farnsworth P. Willowwick of the citizens group Less than Zero.
Virginia Rodmann, spokesperson for LeFemmine de Butche', the largest pro-no-child-producing gay women's group in the San Francisco area said "when gay marriage amendments are accompanied with a ban against semen sharing, there is a 100% chance that population decline will continue to good effect, but this will inevitably create a large black market in underground semen sample production. Just as prohibition created an explosion in criminal enterprises, so would the banning of lesbian, homosexual and heterosexual semen and egg sharing," said Rodmann. "But even so, I can't imagine that gay and lesbian couples will ever produce the number of offspring that we currently see among heterosexuals, especially Roman Catholic ones," said Rodmann. Rodmann's group is exploring the possibility that a new Proposition 9 which repeals Proposition 8 if an iron-clad prohibition on egg and semen exchange will help to reinstate the short-lived gay and lesbian marriage arrangement. Fearing Proposition 9's passage, conservative evangelical California cryonics entrepreneur, Redman Duval Turgeson, has initiated record levels of egg and semen storage in his five California storage facilities. "Some have said that I've decided that if I can't lick 'em I'll join 'em, but I can assure you that I'm not lickin' anybody and I'm certainly not join' 'em. I'm not giving up, I'm just hedging my bets," said Turgeson who also said that the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, without God's people lifting a finger in contempt or retaliation, was a Biblical example of God cleaning house of planet polluters, though he can't understand why most Gays and Lesbians have a higher level of concern for keeping their "cages clean" and their domiciles neatly appointed and color coordinated.
Creating a new advertising consortium aimed at promoting the favorable zero-population aspects of same sex relationships and marriages and underwriting advertising and public relations campaigns with some of Madison Avenue's leading advertising firms are:
Gays For No PopGrow
EGay and ELesbian Harmony.Com
Les Is More
Gay Is Good For Planet Earth
ByeByeBabyByeBye LLP
Greater San Francisco SeeManNoSeMen Society
The GenderNoEngending Assocation of Anneheim
Conservative Evangelical Gays for Childrens' Playground Conversions
Gays and Lesbians Against Lactation
Gay Baby Sitters for State Sponsored Hospice Worker Training
Gay Scout Masters for Disposition of BSA Real Estate
Gays Against Toys-R-US
Gay Gunmen for Blank Shooting Gun Clubs of America
Lesbian Horticulturists for Sterile Human Hybridization
The Gay and Lesbian Anti-Chucky Cheese Alliance
The Bay Area Onan Assembly
Draper Donaldson of the Madison Avenue advertising and public relation's firm of Donaldson, Nicholson and Steele said "getting the world to rethink it's sexual orientation is perhaps the greatest public relations challenge since the discovery of tobacco's negative health effects, but we believe we are up to the job," said Donaldson who jokingly called the new emphasis "pubic relations". Donaldson and Steele, who spent a week in California gathering research for their work said that they enjoyed the fellowship of the Bay Area Onan Assembly the most, but felt some emotional trauma during their target practice with the Gay Gunmen for Blank Shooting Gun Clubs of America and the dinner they hosted in their honor. "The whole world depends on this campaign and producing effective ads that reach India, China and Africa is perhaps the greatest challenge of my life," Donaldson concluded.
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