Respected Diagnostic Survey Hits Dangerously High Bozo Level
by Winsip Custer
Since its first use in 1950 after Alan W. Livingston created the character Bozo the clown in 1946, the national BFAS or Bozo Factor Analytical Survey has judged the seriousness and quality of the United State's leadership. In the 50's, 60's, 70's and 80's the Bozo factor has steadily climbed until today it sits at 200% of its initial 1950 value.
"The only way to reduce the current critically high 'Bozo Level' is to elect leaders with verifiable brains," said BFAS's chief statistician, Herbert C. Pullman. "It's not that expensive to provide the American people with a verifiable MRI, EEG and brain wave analysis from a team of the nation's most qualified neurologists," said Pullman. "John Wayne put it clearly," Pullman continued, "'life is really hard and it's even harder when you're stupid'."
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